The Love Shack (Saturday, after beach party)

[Cres]

Sweetheart hung onto the "I understand" like a drowning man onto driftwood. She didn't question it but accepted it at face value. She wanted him to understand, needed him to understand. And believing that he did made her feel better.

"You know... it wasn't Bp that had the abortions."

She was a bit startled and looked at him. At first she only stared at him as though she didn't quite understand what he was saying. Then her eyes grew a bit wider.

"Who was it, then?" she asked. She felt a coldness of fear inside. How many girls had he had again? Ten? Well, she shouldn't have been surprised, she supposed. But... had he not been careful? How had there been any need for abortions?

Or was it the God's punishment? What if she would be punished herself? How long was it again from when they had had sex? Was it possible that something had happened, despite the condom?

Disgusted at the thought, she tried to push it away. But it didn't go so easily. Her mind was racing between different thoughts and fears way too quickly to her liking.

[Sharise]

Teddy bit his lip. He could tell that Sweetheart's mind was filled with dark thoughts, and it made his stomach turn.

"The first one was Ginny..." Teddy licked his lips as he spoke. He knew Sweetheart would recognize the name and link it back to the girl that they grew up with... until she suddenly moved away when they were fourteen. "And then it happened with Nikki not too long ago."

The boy shifted uncomfortably on the steps. He hated admitting all of this... it'd only cause more problems. And it'd only make her ask more questions... like the drinking, the drugs, the anger.... Just the thought of it made him sick to his stomach. This wasn't how he had planned things to go. He had made plans to kick all of the bad habits before they could ever affect the girl. The only reason he hadn't told her everything was because he thought he could protect to her... he believed that the truth would only alienate her. So far it seemed like he was right.

[Cres]

Sweetheart's eyes widened a little at the first name. She did remember Ginny, and the sudden way she had moved away. Had this been the reason? But she had been so young - and so had he; he was still young, as far as Sweetheart was concerned. The second name made her swallow. Two times. But why? Had he not used protection? Or had it failed? She had so many questions going round in her mind that she could hardly take hold of any of them.

Her little dream world was crumbling fast around her. Suddenly she realised that Teddy wasn't the boy she had thought he was. There were so many secrets - too many secrets. Secrets she had never believed of him.

"Why, Teddy?" she asked very quietly. She wasn't sure exactly what the "why" referred to, herself. To everything, she supposed.

[Sharise]

"Why, Teddy?"

The question echoed in his mind. Why? Why what? The only thing he could think of was the incident with Nikki. That was an easy question to answer.

"We were drunk, and we made a very stupid mistake..." He shook his head. "Neither of us could actually afford it.. so Lance took care of it." Teddy licked his lips. He and Lancer were still very close. "Nikki's one of his girls... so he felt obligated to deal with it.... I'm still paying him back." By this point he wasn't talking to Sweetheart. He wasn't talking to anyone. His mind had drifted, and suddenly.. he just couldn't stop talking. Then again, he didn't even realize he was speaking to begin with.

"One of his girls... it sounds like he owns her or something." Blue eyes glistened as they stared straight ahead to a nearby wall. "I know the shit I get into isn't right... but I can't stop myself. I'm in over my head, only I try not to think about it... I tell myself that I'm in control, I have everything under control... but I don't. I don't have a damned clue where I'm going in life. I mean, sure, I have my dreams... everyone does. But it'll probably never happen for me. And that's ok. I guess.... And who cares if I'm turning into him? I'll never be as bad as him... I'd never hit a woman.... or beat the shit out of a child... especially my own. I wouldn't get drunk and stumble around the house telling my son that he's a no good, worthless piece of shit that was a God damn mistake and never should have been born." Slowly, tears began to fall from the boy's eyes. His attention was locked onto that wall as he spoke. "He was right. I've hurt everyone I've ever gotten close to. Especially Baby.... some of the shit I've done to her... he'd be proud. I still can't figure out why she's still here. She can't possibly love me that much.... if she did then she wouldn't sleep with all of those other guys. Or maybe she's just trying to forget... sometimes I'm not sure what she's thinking. I don't even know what I'm thinking half the time... " He brushed the tears away, but it didn't help. They just kept falling. "I've loved you ever since the moment I laid eyes on you. He told me I'd never be good enough for you... he was right. He was always right. I'm not even close to being half the man you deserve. People like Baby, Lance and me.... we don't deserve to be loved. We're tainted... the only thing we know how to do is hurt people. We stick together because we don't have anyone else. No one could understand it.... unless they've been through it. The things we've seen... no one should ever have to deal with it. We all have our own stories to tell, not that we ever actually would. There are things I haven't told anyone. Things that he did and said... I really should talk to someone about it.. but I think I'd rather take it to my grave..." Slowly, Teddy turned his head and looked at Sweetheart. His eyes were bloodshot and glistening with tears.

The haze began to lift, and he found himself feeling strange. How much had he just told her? "I'm sorry... for everything."

[Cres]

Sweetheart listened in a daze. She had never imagined Teddy would speak to her like this - of such things, in such a way. His tears shocked her, somehow - though they also evoke the old feeling she had had with her ever since she was little; the want to help the boy, in any way she could. Her mind went back to everything they had went through together. Sure, she had got frustrated with his tough guy's act at times, but she had always in the end seen through it to the kind heart he kept inside. Rarely he let it out, and yet she always knew it was there. It was there for her especially. She felt ashamed as she listened to him - ashamed that she had forgotten how hard he had had it, how different - how difficult - his life had been as opposed to hers.

You're just a pampered little girl, Sweetheart. A pampered little girl who doesn't know anything about real life. Those had been Vinnie's bitter words to her just last summer - she remembered. She swallowed as her arm wrapped itself unconsciously tighter around Teddy and she tried to keep the tears inside. He had been so right. She didn't understand anything about what it was like to live in a broken home, in a place where you had to be scared for your life, or worse. She had overlooked Teddy. She had overlooked his past, and everything he had gone through, and had happily forgotten herself into pink fluffy dreams of marriage and happiness, never stopping to think that he might have had his inner demons to battle. Sweetheart felt so guilty she might have cried; but she knew she could not allow that to herself. Not now. She needed to be strong, for Teddy. For them.

"I'm sorry... for everything."

She looked at him and suddenly, a smile entered her face. It was a calm and warm smile, and her other hand came up, pressed against Teddy's cheek, caressing, wiping away the tears. She reached up a little and kissed him on the other cheek, her lips brushing away the tears on that cheek.

"It's okay, Teddy," she whispered, pressing her cheek against his, her lips close to his ear, and her arms now wrapping around him in a loving embrace. “It’ll all be okay. I’ll be here for you. Always. We’ll make it together. I’ll… I’ll help you. Whatever you need.” She pulled her head back to be able to look at him in the eyes, and her soft pastel pink eyes were full of love as she looked at him. “Because I love you. I always have. Faults and all.”

[Sharise]

Teddy smiled through the tears. She had always been the girl for him. Always. And tonight proved it.

"I love you, Sweetheart." He pulled the girl into an embrace and kissed her forhead. She was so amazing... and she was his. He knew then that he had to straighten up. She deserved the best, and that was what he would give her.

[Cres]

Sweetheart smiled happily and wrapped her own arms even tighter around him. Every time those words came off Teddy's lips she felt she had never been happier, and that everything would work out. She remained into the embrace for a few moments, but then the ugly truth of the fact that they were sitting on the stairs outside Teddy's apartment and that the evening could not continue as happily came back to her. Bp was still inside - and probably upset. Sweetheart bit her lip as she thought it all through, and decided what she should do.

She looked at Teddy in the eyes, a calm expression on her face but concern now in her eyes.

"Teddy... I think I should go home. You have to take care of Bp... she sounded so upset. We'll be all right, I mean, everything will work out between you and me. It will. Just that... she needs you right now." She glanced at her watch and grimaced. "And then again... I should go home before dad gets worried. He's been awfully strict about my homecoming hours lately."

She looked at him, hoping he wouldn't take her words the wrong way. Her other hand found its way on his chest, on top of his heart.

"I'll call you tomorrow, okay?"


[[ah I'm deciding it's evening because it's more convenient. That 'kay? lol It's been so long I wasn't sure anymore what time of the day it was supposed to be.]]

[Sharise]

Teddy nodded slowly. Did she really mean it? All of it? "You sure?" He bit his lip. "I can drive you home if you want..." Truth be told... he found it hard to believe that Sweetheart would be ok with him comforting Bp- especially after everything that was said.

Then again... such a thing was in Sweetheart's nature.

[Cres]

Sweetheart smiled reassuringly. She was not totally sure - the beast of jealousy was not completely absent from her heart - but she felt she needed to confirm him of it. Her inner demons were for her to deal with alone for the time being, and besides, she felt this was not the time to allow them room. She needed to think about it alone, and talk with Father Rimani. Yes, that was the most important thing she needed to do. Talk with Father Rimani.

She kissed him on the lips, then pulled back.

"No, I think... I'll walk. I need some fresh air anyway." She started to stand up, then looked at her. "It'll be all right, Teddy."

[Sharise]

Teddy smiled and stood as well. He gave a slow nod in response to what the girl had said. "I'll see you tomorrow."

He still felt bad about letting her walk home.. but if it was what she wanted to do, then so be it. Besides... she was right. Bp really needed him right now. It'd be cruel to just leave her like that.. especially after everything she had done for him. He just prayed things would smooth over easily.

Pulling himself back to reality, Teddy smiled once more and placed a gentle kiss on Sweetheart's forehead. "Good night."

[Cres]

Sweetheart smiled again and nodded.

“Good night, Teddy.” Then she got up and started walking down the stairs again, this time more calmly. As she descended the stairs she felt a sudden rush of gratefulness that she had decided not to wear make up, though she had considered it. She would have felt weird, not to mention it might have upset her again, had she had to go back into the apartment to wash her face. She felt things needed to calm down before she could go back there – or meet Bp, for that matter.

She paused for a moment at the first landing down, to look behind her at Teddy and wave with a smile. Then she started down the stairs again and tried to get her mind off of Bp and concentrate on all the wonderful things Teddy had said to her that evening. And to the fact that they were now officially a couple. He had finally asked her to start dating. That was what mattered. Everything else… they could sort out everything else.

So she kept telling herself as she descended the stairs.

[[I’ll start the new thread for Sweet’s home then, eh? What do you suppose is the precise connection between Liam and Sweet’s family? Shall we say that Tin Rosacci is closely connected to the family that owns the restaurant where he works as a cook, and Liam is hugely liked by that family, and they therefore introduced him to the Rosaccis, and then Tin decided he would like Sweets and Liam to meet so he’s asked him over for dinner? That cool?]]

[Sharise]

Teddy smiled as he watched Sweetheart retreat down the stairs. Everything was going to be fine. It had to be. Even if it was going to take a lot of work, he'd do it. He loved the girl too much to let her go.

Once the redhead was out of sight, Teddy turned and headed back toward the apartment. He had a lot to take care of.

[That sounds most excellent to me. :D Liam's a very charming man, so it'd make sense that everyone likes him. lol]