Sharise
Tease on a Leash
"Must I hide?"
Posts: 727
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Post by Sharise on Mar 26, 2006 2:19:23 GMT -5
"Baby..." Teddy looked up at Bp, his voice and eyes pleading with the girl. "What happened?"
Bp shook her head and wavy locks of hair fell over her eyes. "He asked me to stay and I said no." She shrugged. "He was really hurt." It was obvious by the girl's voice that she was fighting back some serious emotions.
"Oh." Teddy bit his lip as he looked up at his best friend. Something inside of him stirred, but he quickly pushed it to the side. Now wasn't the time. "Well," He gently brushed back the hair that had fallen over the girl's face. "Do you want to talk about it?"
Bp looked into those blue eyes and nearly lost it. "Theodore..." She swallowed hard and looked back away. "I wasn't ready..."
Instantly, Teddy knew what she was talking about. Them. "I know." His hands slowly moved from her hips to around her waist.
"Do you?" Pale eyes flashed. She felt so mixed up inside. What were these emotions she was feeling? One second she was jealous, then sad, then angry... what was going on? She and Teddy had only been friends... right? "Do you have any idea what it's been like?"
Teddy licked his lips as he shook his head. "I wish I did..." He slowly stood up. "Why don't you tell me.." He wanted to know what was going on in her head. It had to be more than she usually let on.
"Okay..." Bp swallowed and stood. She came close to the boy and shook her head. "I come home one day and find out that you had slept with the girl you had a crush on when you were a kid. And in our bed, Teddy. We made a promise." It took everything she had to keep her voice hushed. She was pissed off and hurt. Not a good combination for the young spitfire.
"I know..." Teddy's voice was strained as he spoke. His eyes had locked onto the girl and weren't leaving anytime soon.
"Yeah?" Bp shook her head. What the fuck was happening to them? "Does she even know about us? About all of the other girls? The drugs? The alcohol?"
Teddy nodded slowly. He had become very... stiff. "I told her."
Bp's lips curled into a dark smile. "Does she know about everything else? About your drinking problem? All of the other addictions? The abortions? What happens when you lose your temper around her, Teddy? Are you going to go and punch holes into walls like you do now?"
Every word stung just as much as the first. He knew how much he had hurt Bp by this, and it killed him. "No, she doesn't know about any of it." Tears threatened to spill out from the teen's eyes, but he forced them back.
"Huh.." Bp shook her head and crossed her arms. "I didn't think so." She paced back and forth for a second before turning her attention back to Teddy. "I'm going to have to move out, you realize that, right?" The anger had disappeared and was replaced by sorrow.
Teddy's eyes went wide. "What?" He shook his head. "Why?"
Bp laughed in order to keep herself from crying. "She hates me, Teddy. I'm nothing but some stupid whore that used to fuck her boyfriend." She ran a hand through her hair and looked him straight in the eye. It was obvious he was hurting just as badly. "Face it.. we're doomed, Teddy. You can't be in a relationship and still live with me. No girl in her right mind would ever put up with that. No one would ever be able to understand it either."
A single tear ran down Teddy's cheek and he quickly wiped it away. "Sweetheart doesn't think that. And she does understand. She does. You're my best friend. What's not to understand? You can't move out... " He closed the space between them, but didn't touch her. "I couldn't handle it. I need you here. I want you here."
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Post by Cres on Mar 26, 2006 2:38:54 GMT -5
Sweetheart could hardly keep herself still and quiet as she listened. She knew she shouldn't have. And she knew all the more the farther the conversation indoors went. And she wanted to leave by the time they had got to the mention of "their" bed, but she forced herself to stay still. She had seen her share of soap operas. The way misunderstandings were born was to leave before you heard it all.
Unfortunately, this time the good advice of hearing it all didn't really help. In fact it seemed to make it all the worse. Especially since, even in all the pain she felt for hearing all these things, and even in all the jealousy she felt rising in her, she still felt sympathy for Bp. She felt sympathy for them both. It was like overhearing a lost romance... and she realised suddenly that she was the third woman this time. She may have known Teddy longer, she may have been there first, but even so... Bp was the one to know the boy the way he really was... now.
And it was painfully obvious to Sweetheart as Bp divulged Teddy's secrets that she really didn't. She didn't even know if she was in love with a dream, rather than reality, now.
"I couldn't handle it. I need you here. I want you here."
At those words Sweetheart finally couldn't remain listening any longer. She staggered back, a thousand thoughts scurrying through her mind, a thousand feelings. It was impossible for her to even really know what she felt. There was too much, too much information, too much pain, too much feeling. It was mostly luck that she didn't hit anything as she retreated from the door. She made it back to the couch and sat down, holding her head that felt like it was spinning out of control.
She felt hot tears in her eyes and tried to force them back. No, she mustn't show she was upset. She mustn't show she had heard it all. It was wrong that she had listened in the first place. It was private, she shouldn't know... she should behave as though nothing was wrong... nothing should be wrong. She must think this through before she confront him. Yes, she must have some time.... maybe she should leave, before they came out again? She didn't want an argument, and she wasn't sure about how she felt, what she would say, what he would say, what would happen. No, she couldn't face him right now.
She needed time. Panicked, she glanced back toward the room where the two were. The decision was made within seconds. She rushed up from the couch and practically ran to the door. She slipped her shoes on and opened the door. She had to fumble a little for it and realised her hands were shaking badly. She pressed her eyes closed for a second, but the determination was still there. She opened the door, slipped out, closed the door behind him and started to make her way down the stairs, wiping her eyes with her hand to remove the tears.
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Sharise
Tease on a Leash
"Must I hide?"
Posts: 727
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Post by Sharise on Mar 26, 2006 2:45:15 GMT -5
Before the two could say another word, the sound of a door opening and closing sounded throughout the apartment.
"Fuck..." Teddy bounded out of the room and down the hall. She had left.
As Teddy dashed out of the room, Bp lost it. She fell onto the bed, unable to control the tears that were pouring out. What was going to happen?
Teddy looked at the door and without a second thought, he ran out of the apartment. "Sweetheart!?!?" He chased after the girl and fortunately caught her on the stairs. "Sweetheart, wait!" He bounded down the steps with little effort and ran out in front of the girl, blocking her way. "We have to talk...." He knew she had heard everything.... why else would she have left?
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Post by Cres on Mar 26, 2006 2:48:35 GMT -5
Hearing the door open above and the hurried footsteps down, Sweetheart was close to shouting a dirty word herself. No, she didn't want him coming after her! That's why she had left!
And as the familiar face of the boy she had always loved blocked her way, she wiped some tears off her face and looked at him with a sudden fury in her eyes. She had never assumed she could be angry at him, but now it suddenly didn't seem that difficult.
"Not now!" she said more snappily than she had meant. Didn't he understand she just wanted some time?
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Sharise
Tease on a Leash
"Must I hide?"
Posts: 727
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Post by Sharise on Mar 26, 2006 2:53:01 GMT -5
"Yes now." Teddy was a bit taken back by the girl's tone, but he had expected it. "If you go now, I know damn well that we will never talk again. So all we have is right now." He began walking forward, trying to force Sweetheart backward without touching her. "I know you heard everything."
His eyes were locked onto the redhead as he spoke. He didn't even stop to think that he might be scaring the girl. "We have to talk about it, Sweetheart." He shook his head. "Just ask me. Ask me anything. I'll tell you the truth. I swear it."
Blue eyes glistened. "I love you.... you know I do."
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Post by Cres on Mar 26, 2006 2:58:09 GMT -5
She didn't agree with him on the moment, but as he approached her she realised that even if she might have been fully willing to talk later, he might not have been. He always had Bp, didn't he? His Baby. He'd just go to her, and it would be over. She would never have another chance. She swallowed and allowed him to push her backward, though suddenly, she realised, she was afraid. Bp had spoken about violence... what had she meant? Was Teddy really like that? She hadn't realised... and, then, he would never hurt her, would he? And what did it all mean? And...
"I love you.... you know I do."
Those words brought tears back into her eyes. She looked at him, her hands still shaking, and it was obvious from her that she was upset and on the verge of breaking out crying.
"I know..." She had to be fair. She did know. She knew it with all of her soul. She swallowed tears again, and tried wiping them away. She couldn't face him, it hurt too much, so she turned her eyes away.
"But do you love her more?"
The question had to be asked. It broke her heart, but it needed to be asked - and answered. She wasn't sure anymore.
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Sharise
Tease on a Leash
"Must I hide?"
Posts: 727
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Post by Sharise on Mar 26, 2006 3:03:02 GMT -5
Teddy swallowed hard at Sweetheart's question. Tears came to his eyes and he shook his head. His mouth opened and he tried to say 'no' but nothing came out. Horror rushed into the boy's eyes. He didn't love Bp more than Sweetheart.. did he? No, of course not... she was his friend. Nothing more.
Finally, a sound came from the boy's lips and he shook his head furiously. "No..." Though he didn't know what he was replying to.... there were so many questions running through his mind. Why was this happening?
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Post by Cres on Mar 26, 2006 3:08:44 GMT -5
Sweetheart turned her head a little toward the boy again as the silence continued, to see his face. She could see how hard it was for him to answer. And that alone was an answer enough. She knew the love was there. And the fact that he needed to think about it... it hurt so much that she nearly broke in tears.
However, the answer did come... though it was too late to fully suffice. Sweetheart might have been naive but she wasn't stupid. She took a wavering breath and looked at him fully in the face. She wasn't sure if she believed him. But even in her messed up state of mind she did understand what it meant that he would say so. From the look on his face she knew that he wanted to make it all right with her.
"All right," she said very, very quietly. Her voice was trembling, and it was clear that a single misplaced word could send her off again. "We... let's talk. But I don't want to go back there. Not now. I don't know... just not now."
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Sharise
Tease on a Leash
"Must I hide?"
Posts: 727
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Post by Sharise on Mar 26, 2006 3:17:54 GMT -5
Teddy nodded, glad she hadn't slapped him or tried to get away. "Okay." He licked his lips. "We can go anywhere.. we could even stay here if you want. Anywhere you want."
He had no idea what he had gotten into, and it scared him. What was Bp doing back in the apartment? Was she okay? And Sweetheart... what was she going to do? How the hell could he fix this? Was it possible? Even more importantly - did he want to try?
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Post by Cres on Mar 26, 2006 5:00:18 GMT -5
Sweetheart wiped the tears away from her eyes as best she could. She was too upset to think of Bp at all. He wanted to talk now, so, all right, they would talk... somewhere. She tried to remain calm.
"In the stairs?" She shook her head and looked at Teddy. But where could they go? There was no place... and inside, she guessed that Bp was breaking apart. She had sounded so bad. And what about Dan? And what about everything?
Her entire world was collapsing around her, and suddenly the pressure became too bad. She started crying.
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Sharise
Tease on a Leash
"Must I hide?"
Posts: 727
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Post by Sharise on Mar 26, 2006 5:17:13 GMT -5
Teddy's eyes went wide as Sweetheart began to cry. The girl's tears washed away all other thoughts as he sat down, pulling her into his arms.
"It's going to be okay..." He kissed the top of Sweetheart's head, unsure of what else to do. Cheering girls up was not one of his strong points. The only girl he knew well enough to see her cry was Bp, and well... she didn't cry very often, and when she did she tried to hide it. So this was all brand new to him.
"We'll make things work... we will..." By this point Teddy was talking more to himself than anything. Things had to work out. He couldn't let her get away.
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Post by Cres on Mar 28, 2006 1:08:04 GMT -5
Sweetheart allowed Teddy pull her into his arms, sobbing. She trembled a little as she continued crying, but his words and his voice were a comfort. She was so confused. She felt she should have been angry... he had lied to her, or at least, had not told her everything, and yet... she couldn't bring herself to full anger. It was not in her. She had not yet been pushed over that edge, even if it loomed close.
After a while of sobbing she finally got herself under control a little. It suddenly flashed through her mind that if her brother or father ever found out what had just transpired they would absolutely kill Teddy. That thought alone forced her to rein herself in, become calmer. Teddy was right. They would make it all right. Somehow. They must. It was meant to be. It had always been meant to be.
"Teddy... I love you too... I've always loved you." Sweetheart looked up, into his eyes. Her pink eyes glistened with the last unshed tears. "I've never loved anyone else. I just... I just want us to be happy."
It was all she could think to say. She just wanted to make everything all right. She didn't care what it might cost to her. She just wanted it all to be all right.
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Sharise
Tease on a Leash
"Must I hide?"
Posts: 727
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Post by Sharise on Mar 28, 2006 23:24:35 GMT -5
Teddy smiled softly to Sweetheart. "I know.... I know." He kissed her forehead gently. Ever since childhood, he had dreamed of being with her.... so why was he fucking it up now?
Unable to think clearly, Teddy shook his head. "I'm sorry.. I really am..." A single shoulder shrugged. "I guess I was just afraid.. you know? I mean.. that's some serious shit... I didn't want you to hate me." He laughed lightly at the statement. "Guess that worked against me, huh?"
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Post by Cres on Mar 29, 2006 9:03:56 GMT -5
Sweetheart wiped away the last tears from her eyes. She had to smile, a little. A weak sort of a smile, but it was there.
"I guess so." She then breathed in and out a few times, calming herself. Then she looked at him in the eyes, seriously. "But... you do realise... that, if we will ever, I mean, ever..." She couldn't finish the sentence, and had to look away for a moment. She leaned her shoulder against him, but didn't look at him in the eyes as she arranged her thoughts and then continued: "What Bp said... about you two living together... I... I don't have a problem with that."
She wasn't sure if it was true, but she thought it safest to say. She had concluded that already a long time ago. She would not demand Bp and Teddy to move apart, at least not before Teddy and her would start thinking about moving in together. She wasn't that kind of a girlfriend. She wanted to be the best girlfriend in the world. And she wanted to trust Teddy. It amazed her that that was still what she wanted to do.
Oh dear, she thought, I need to talk to Father Rimani as soon as get the chance. I am so confused.
She took another breath. She needed to finish what she had started.
"But... I just... you do understand that... if we ever decide... decide to... well, become really serious... we will have to... think about the living arrangements... again. I mean, you and I... if we ever want to live together." Sweetheart shook her head, unsure if she was making any sense to him, with what the broken sentences. "I don't know yet what I'll think about it. About... her. About what it means that you say that you need her. I don't know yet. But... we decided to take things slowly. I think we should... we should keep taking things slowly. You know what I mean?" She looked at him, hoping that she had made sufficiently sense for him to understand what she wanted to say.
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Sharise
Tease on a Leash
"Must I hide?"
Posts: 727
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Post by Sharise on Mar 29, 2006 17:30:06 GMT -5
Teddy listened quietly. He wasn't used to hearing Sweetheart fumble over her words, and in a way, it freaked him out. And for some reason, the girl's words did not comfort him at all. But of course, he simply told himself that he was just too stressed out to really understand.
The boy smiled and nodded his head. "I understand." But he didn't. What did she mean, take things slowly? The girl's words had 'trouble' written all over them. Something just wasn't right... and then there was Bp...
"You know... it wasn't Bp that had the abortions." Before he could stop himself, the words had fallen from his lips. This night was not going well.
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