A Painful Monday (Monday after beach party)

[Cres]

Dan wasn't sure where Chip had gone. At the moment he didn't really care. He was sitting on the couch, a bag of ice on his forehead, his head throbbing like a thousand hammers had been banging on it. Ronny was lying in front of the TV, looking quite lazy. The bottles and the rest had been collected away; Dan had spent a few hours on it, and the apartment was beginning to smell fresh again.

Not that Dan would have noticed. His mood was as black as his memory.


[[short but will do. I kind of assumed she'd have come to him the next day. Chip is out with Ace or out clubbing or shopping or whatever.]]

[Sharise]

Bp sighed as she stopped in front of the familiar apartment door. She knew Dan wouldn't be jumping for joy to see her, but little did she know just how upset he was. And she wouldn't have even dared think that he might have turned to a man for comfort last night.

Taking a deep breath, she reached out and knocked on the door. As a stray lock of hair was pushed back into place, the girl braced herself for what was to come.

[Cres]

The knock resounded and blasted through Dan's head like a million steel spikes. He grunted and moaned a little.

"Just go away," he whispered, not loud enough to be heard to the other side of the door. Ronny had stood up and was staring at him, whining a little. He had been worried about his master since last night.

Dan opened his eyes and looked at the dog bleakly. He sighed.

"Oh all right," he grunted and got up. He didn't take off the bag of ice as he made his way to the door. There was an annoyed and suffering look on his face as he snatched the door open. His mouth opened to tell the visitor off, but when his mind recognised Bp, he blinked and closed his mouth again.

"Uh." That was all that came out of his mouth for the time being. He realised he looked like shit, whereas she looked hot - like always - and let the bag of ice sag down to almost cover his eyes. "Hi."

[Sharise]

Bp jumped back as the door went flying open, and a rather gruff looking Dan prepared to attack. However, when the man realized it was her and calmed down, she stepped forward. It was obvious by the expession on her face that she was worried. What the hell had happened last night?

"Hi..." She bit her lip and stepped forward. "Dan... I... I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for last night." A slender hand delicately pulled the icepack away from the man's face. "Dan... what happened last night?"

[Cres]

Dan moistened his lips a little as he allowed her to remove the ice pack. As his eyes wandered on her body he realised that he'd missed her. Despite being angry with her for screwing with his head, he had missed her.

Why had he gone to the gay bar? And what the hell had happened last night?

He felt confused enough to step aside to let her in, though he hadn't really meant to. But then, her question made him swallow a bit. Did everyone know already? He frowned as he pulled her in and closed the door behind her.

"I just got a little drunk," he said curtly and took the ice bag back. He started walking toward the couch, broad shoulders a little hunched in a grumpy sort of way. "What you got to be sorry about, anyway?" He slouched on the couch again and leaned his head back, to the same position as he was before. "And keep your voice down. I just got the hammer boys to cool it for a while."

He wasn't sure if he could just play it cool and pretend nothing happened last night - but he sure as hell was going to try.

But had she been talking with someone? Did she know? Shit, had Chip told someone? That guy just couldn't keep a secret, could he?

[Sharise]

A frown graced Bp's lips as she was pulled into the apartment, and Dan's comments made her frown even more. But with the blink of an eye, the sad expression had completely left the girl's face. She was the master at hiding feelings. Most of the time.

Taking a seat beside Dan, she shrugged in response to his question. "Running out on you last night." Her head tilted as she studied the man carefully. He was hiding something. "I didn't mean to hurt or confuse you. I just haven't spent an entire night with a man in a long time." Pale eyes stared down at the floor now. There were so many memories running through her mind. None of which she wanted to remember.

Looking back up at Dan, she smiled slightly. "That's why I'm sorry." Her eyes trailed up and down his body. He had been with someone else last night... it was a look that was all too familiar. So many of her friends had that same expression and attitude after a drunken night with a stranger- which they always regretted. Even so, Bp couldn't deny the fact that she was a little miffed by it. But whatever... she deserved it, and besides, they weren't exclusive.

"Well..." She stood up, adjusting her clothes. "I'll let you keep your little secret about last night... I just wanted to stop by and let you know how I feel." The blonde slowly began to back away from the couch, but then stopped a foot or two away. "If you find yourself in need of the ultimate hangover cure... just give me a call."

[Cres]

Dan listened to her quietly. He really, really wanted to end it with her. He had half decided on it already. Not because he wouldn't have liked her, or because he would have been too angry or too hurt. But because he knew he could like her. He could even love her. And he supposed it would be best for the both of them if he did end it. Right then, when she stood up and started to go, he should have let her, and never called her again, to protect his own heart and her. He didn't know if she could ever love him. It was irrelevant. The fact that she'd be with him to start with would be a risk - a risk he wasn't sure if he wanted her to take. It would have been best, he had convinced himself, if he ended it now and let her believe that it was because she had left. It was a less painful reason than any other he might have come up with.

But despite himself... her words touched on something. He knew she hadn't meant to hurt him. He wasn't sure why she'd left, he wasn't even sure if he cared why. The point was, she liked him. Why else had she come? And then, he found himself missing her already. He wasn't sure why. Probably because she wasn't clingy. He'd never dealt well with that type. She was independent, and strong, and someone he could respect. That's what he'd always looked for in a woman - that was why none of the girls his father had introduced to him, fine Italian women of fine Italian families, had really interested him enough to even think of anything even halfway serious.

And then, she seemed to know he'd been up to something last night. And if for nothing else but pride, he felt he needed to explain to her. He might feel better about looking at gay people now, but he still felt offence at the very thought that someone might have mistaken him for one.

His good decisions left behind, he lifted the ice bag a little and glanced after her, a tiny smile on his face.

"What kind of a secret is it, if everyone knows? Who told you, anyway? I didn't even know you knew Chip."

[Sharise]

A small smile washed over the girl's face. She could feel the relief set in at the sound of his voice. He didn't hate her. That was a good thing. That ment she could make things right again... or at least try.

Taking a few steps forward, Bp shrugged a single shoulder. "No one said a word to me." Another smile. "I just know that look. Many of my friends have had that look." Her head tilted. "Y'know, that look when you've woken up to a complete stranger laying beside you, all because of one drunken mistake." To show that she really did understand, and that she wasn't angry.... well, not very anyway, Bp took it upon herself to plop down on the couch beside Dan. "So who was she? Or he." That last part was meant as a joke... or so she thought.

[Cres]

Dan's expression at the intended joke probably gave away everything he wouldn't have wanted to tell. He tried turning his head away, but he knew it was too late and ended up just staring at Ronny instead. The dog was still sleeping. He wished he'd been sleeping too.

"It was really stupid," he said. "And I don't even remember any of it. Or, not very much."

[Sharise]

Bp's eyes grew as big as saucers. At the moment, she wasn't quite sure what she felt. "Dan... I was just joking." She blinked a few times, trying to get her thoughts together. He had slept with a man?? Dan?? What the hell was going on here?

Running a hand through her hair, she looked at Dan. Oddly, she wasn't upset or weirded out. She had more than enough gay and bisexual friends, so very little could disturb her. "Well...." A small smile crept onto her lips and she gently slipped a hand under Dan's chin, guiding his head in her direction. "I guess this means you don't have a problem with gay guys anymore." WIth that said, she leaned forward and kissed the man on the nose. He had to have had a rough night.

[Cres]

Dan tensed against Bp's touch at first, but allowed her to turn his head anyway, and when she kissed him on the nose, most of his stiffness melted. He smiled a bit and wrapped one arm around her shoulders, pulling her closer for a hug. After that he looked at her again, shaking his head a little.

"It's not what you think, though," he said. "I mean... I didn't really sleep with him. I think. Well, I can't be sure. I don't remember. I just remember asking him to kiss me, just so I'd know what it feels like... but the bad thing is, I don't remember what it felt like. I don't even remember... All I remember is going to that club." Once he had started, he couldn't stop anymore. He wanted so bad to tell someone, anyone, and Bp seemed like she cared. At least she was listening. At least she hadn't freaked out. "I only went because of Chip, you know. I mean, he's always wanted me to try that shit out, so I'd see it's not that bad or something. I didn't really mean to pick up anyone. I don't think I did, either. I mean, I just asked the guy if he'd like to come over and talk. I don't remember what we talked about though, and I guess he might have got the wrong idea. I have no idea how we got to the bed, but I just don't think... I mean, I've never even felt anything when I look at a guy. I still don't. I mean, when I look at you..." He looked at her and his hand went behind her back, caressing. His eyes had an intent look. "I feel something. I want to... do things. But looking at a guy... it doesn't do anything for me. I don't think... I mean... I don't know."

He sighed as he sat back on the couch, letting his hand drop from her back. He didn't think she'd understand what he tried to say. He didn't think he had changed overnight from being straight into being bi, certainly it didn't feel like it. And he would have wanted to prove it, but he couldn't. And he didn't even know why he wanted so firmly to prove he didn't feel anything toward men.

[Sharise]

A soft smile graced the girl's lips as she was pulled in for a hug. Despite what she tried to tell herself, she was really falling for the man. Looking up into those ruby eyes, Bp felt her wall slowly crumble as all the words began to spill from Dan's lips. One part in particular stuck out.

"...I mean, when I look at you...I feel something...."

Those words continued to repeat themselves in the girl's head. What did that mean? Did he really only mean that in a sexual way? It sounded like so much more than that. But was it?

Bp shook her head, partially in response to everything Dan had said, and partially in an attempt to clear her head. "Dandy..." As she tilted her head, her expression softened. "I'm the last person in the world you will ever have to justify yourself to. I love you regardless..." And there it was, verbal vomit. She had said it.. but she couldn't dwell on it. Not allowing a second of silence, Bp continued. "You were curious... and you were upset. Mix those two things with alcohol and anything can, and most likely will, happen. You didn't do anything wrong. And if one day you wind up believing that you really are bisexual, then so be it. It doesn't change who you are, and it won't matter to the people who care about you." She smiled a little. "But the fact that you don't remember what the kiss was like...." A smirk. "That just means you'll have to do it again." A pale eye winked at the redhead.

There was a mental sigh of relief as Bp stopped speaking. She had covered her slip up nicely.. or rather, that was what she wanted to believe. And although she was still freaked out that she had said it, and even more freaked out that she had accepted the fact that she meant it..... she couldn't help but to fear Dan's reaction.

[Cres]

[[eee she said the l-word! ]]

It took until the point when Bp stopped talking for Dan to realise that she had said that word. That she had used that verb. She hadn't said "like" or "feel attracted to" or anything of the sort. She had said "love". His eyes were on her, wondering, rather wider than normal, and his jaws moved a little as he tried to decide what he wanted to respond - and what he felt about it. Something had instantly felt warmer inside when she had said it. Something wanted to kiss her and tell her he loved her too. Something wanted to let go of the mental barriers and forget about the risks.

But the sensible side of him fought back. He didn't have anything to offer to a girl. Sure, he had a rich family and whatever material things he might ever desire he could get. The inheritance he was looking at promised him a luxurious life - but on the other hand, it also promised him danger. It promised him a life as a crime lord. Sometimes it was hard for him to reconciliate the sweet nature of his mother with the fact that she was in the business. Sure, she was only a lawyer and what she did was just defending her family before the law. And had she chosen so, she would never have even needed to become part of the business. She could have simply kept her mouth shut and accept it, but she hadn't needed to be part of it.

He had to wonder what Bp would do. If they were ever to have a future together, a real future, she would need to make that choice too. Despite Dan's bitter hatred toward what he was doing and what he had been born to be, he couldn't escape it. And if she were to marry him, she couldn't either.

He was taking this too far. He realised it when he looked at her. He should not have been thinking about the future that far. He should concentrate on the now. Everything else would sort itself out, one way or another. Was that not what Chip always said? Go with the flow.

Dan had been silent for a long time, and he suspected it might have made Bp a little suspicious. But he didn't care. For once, he didn't feel the need to explain. He reached out his arm and pulled her in closer again, an intent look in his red eyes. Looking at her for a moment, his face very close to hers, he then said with a bit of a smile.

"I'd much rather kiss you," he said and pressed his lips on hers. He kissed her passionately, his other hand finding its way on her neck as the other one wrapped tightly around her waist, pulling her in.

After the kiss he put his head to her shoulder, closing his eyes. He hardly even realised what he was doing when his lips formed a string of words he had never spoken to anyone before. "And I love you too."

He wasn't sure why he said it. He supposed he felt the need to respond to her saying it first. And then, it wasn't entirely inaccurate. He freaked out a little for saying it, but after he had, he felt better. It felt better to talk. He never talked. Why was it that she was making it happen?

It must be the hangover, he thought to himself.

[Sharise]

Bp tried to keep her cool as Dan stared at her, wide eyed. What was he thinking? It couldn't have been good. The silence had lasted far too long. How badly had she messed up?

A million questions were whizzing through the girl's head, and then.. he spoke. It wasn't what she had wanted to hear, but she smiled anyway and returned the kiss. Passion and all. Sadness filled her eyes as the man rested his head on her shoulder. Why had she said it? She knew that he didn't feel the same way.... right? Wrong.

"And I love you too."

Before she knew it, Bp found herself grinning from ear to ear. It was a good thing Dan's eyes were closed, or else he would've seen a completely different side to her just then. Not that that would have been a bad thing. After pulling herself together, she pulled away just enough so she could see Dan's face.

"I think this calls for a celebration." She smiled and kissed his aching head. "Just tell me what you want, and I will make it happen."

[Cres]

Dan opened his eyes when Bp pulled off to see his face. He was slightly surprised to see how happy she suddenly looked. Her following words and a kiss on the head made him smile, however. He was still a little uncertain of what this meant, but she seemed happy and that was the most important thing for the moment.

He felt tempted to ask her one certain thing. She had more than efficiently already once said she wouldn't go steady with him. Not the monogamous type, had been her words. He found the concept fascinating - to love someone, to love many? Was he the only one she loved? There were so many questions he would have wanted to ask her, but then... he was afraid of hearing the answers. He hadn't chosen to get attached, but it was beginning to dawn on him that he had, after all. He did love her. But could he keep her?

"You could start with that ultimate hangover cure you mentioned earlier," were finally his words, accompanied by a smile.



[[okay, two questions. One: is this before or after Ace+Bp talk? And two: Dan may end up blurting out some of these questions of his - do we want that to happen?]]