Evening at Chip'n'Dan's (some days pre-Halloween)

[Cres]

Chip smiled a little to Ace's words about visiting the IT department. He still couldn't bring himself to a full smile, since - though Colorado hadn't realised it - this subject brought no more happy thoughts to him than the thoughts of Dan. He hated the secrecy. At some time it had still been just exciting, and even when it had started to hurt him he had been well able to hide it all inside, somewhere, telling himself it didn't matter. But love mattered to him. And now that he was in love... it all mattered. For one mad moment he thought of intercepting Ace on a corridor at school and kissing him to show to everyone just what was going on... but the moment passed as reason took over. It would not be wise, for neither of them, and it might even get dangerous. Not just for Chip, but for Ace. Chip had enemies, and he knew that some of them would love nothing more than finding his weakness and use it to crush him. He couldn't allow that to happen. It was too horrible to even think about - and almost enough for him to even want to end the relationship, just to protect Ace from what might happen.

In the end, love overcame fear every time he thought about it.

Colorado groaned.

"That sucks big time," he said, seeming highly aggravated. "Why won't this world change? But really, what stops you? I mean, honestly, Chip, for the love of bunny-rabbits," Colorado never used the word "god" and had found most eccentric ways of replacing it in certain phrases he otherwise liked to use, "tell your dad already! So you'll lose the teaching job but you have other incomes, I know you don't really need it anyway. If your dad doesn't get it then fuck him! Or, well, don't fuck him but the point is you don't really need him."

Chip glared at Collie from his breakfast, nibbling at one of his eggs reluctantly.

"I can't do that," he said gruffly. "Not yet."

"Why not?" Collie insisted, and it was clear the two had had this conversation before. "For crying out loud, if it's the money I can well provide for you until you can get your own IT company up or something - I know that's what you're going to do eventually anyway, and you'd be a huge success, too."

At this point Chip, feeling backed into a corner especially because he was conscious that Ace was watching, slammed his fork down on the table, his eyes flashing, so that all the items on the table clinked and jumped a little.

"I can't!" he practically shouted. Ace would not have ever seen him so angry; his face was a mask of fury and pain as he met Collie's eyes for a short instant, then he pushed his chair back so that it fell on the floor and stormed away, to the bathroom - slamming the door behind him. Inside, where the others couldn't see him, he fell sitting on the toilet seat, his elbows on his knees and his face in his hands. It hurt too much at that moment - not so much the fact that he couldn't tell the whole world about everything, but it hit him so hard that there were so many secrets he was keeping from Ace. Secrets that could get him killed. And secrets for which he might never be able to live happily and openly with Ace, yet could not explain to the blond why it was so.

Colorado had jumped back on his seat when Chip had suddenly stormed off, and now he hugged himself, looking very small and frightened as he stared at the closed bathroom door with very wide eyes. He'd seen Chip angry before, but he'd never got quite that furious of this old argument. If you looked, you could see something glimmering in Colorado's eyes; he had teared up for the shock, though wasn't crying.

[Kat]

Ace had noticed the tension Chip was putting out the moment Colorado spoke, glancing sideways at his boyfriend, simply observing the conversation. He didn't quite like where it was going, easily able to tell it was a sore spot between the two friends. But he hadn't been expecting Chip to slam his chair back angrily and stalk out of the room. In all honesty, it scared the blond. He'd never seen Chip angry before and he'd just displayed a lot of anger. Even though he tried not to, he couldn't help but wonder what would happen if they ever argued. Would Chip get that angry with him? Would he get so aggressive?

He glanced over at Colorado, the remainder of his breakfast forgotten as his appetite had died. "I've never seen him angry before." He wasn't sure what he was expecting Colorado to say, especially seeing that he looked every bit as upset as Ace. He just needed him to say something, anything to keep him from silently slipping out of the apartment. He was very susceptible to anger in any form, even if it wasn't directed entirely at him, it still affected him and frightened him. So seeing Chip angry was bound to do nothing but reverse the affects of everything that had happened between the couple already, all of the trust that had been built up was now in jeopardy. He tried to stay calm, hoping that maybe Chip's sudden outburst had been years of Colorado harassing him about his family building up.

[Cres]

Colorado turned his head from the bathroom door with a faint attempt at a smile.

“Italian temper, eh?” But when he met Ace’s eyes and heard his words, he suddenly realised that the blond had got really quite upset. Though Colorado, because of his sensitive nature, had got upset himself, it was different for him, because he and Chip went so long way back – he knew nothing would ever break their friendship, and he knew Chip wouldn’t get aggressive with him.

“Oh, honey,” he said, reaching his hand over the table to lay it on top of Ace’s, his face changing from upset to sympathetic. “I’m sorry you had to see that – he’s not really like that at all, it’s Dan who goes bashing around, Chip rarely even loses his temper, and would never do it with you. It’s just…” Colorado seemed to run out of appropriate way to continue, patted Ace’s hand and then withdrew his own, sighing as he put his hands in his lap and glanced at the bathroom door. He was trying to come up with a good way of saying what he wanted to say; he wasn’t much of a talker, not like Chip, and it was hard for him to formulate his thoughts into words. He sighed again as he looked at Ace, and there was a sorrowful look in his eyes. “You know sometimes, when people are in a lot of pain, they try to hide it into anger. I guess it has something to do with trying to block out the pain, or tell yourself it isn’t really there. Well… that’s all Chip’s anger really is, pain in another form. You know he’d never admit to being hurt, ever. I can see through his defences though – though he thinks I’m too weak to handle it, and I suppose he’s right, but I can still see it. You can’t share everything for fifteen years with someone and not learn to see through their barriers.”

Colorado looked down into the funny face in his egg, which still had one eye and a corner of the smirk left, hoping to hide the moist look in his eyes behind downcast eyelids.

“I guess I shouldn’t push him so hard about telling his dad, but how else is he ever going to give in? He’s been telling me for fifteen years now that he’ll tell Mario eventually, once he’s up on his own two feet and doesn’t need him anymore, but I think it’s just an excuse. Sure, he tells anyone who’s willing to listen that he doesn’t care if his father will disown him for it, but I know it isn’t true. It hurts him, and that’s why he gets so angry whenever I push him about it. But he can’t live like that.” Collie looked up at Ace, anxious look in his eyes. “Especially now that he’s found someone like you. He can’t keep living a lie, it just isn’t fair for either one of you. I know he wants to make it public anyway, I can see it in his eyes, and you know…” Colorado paused, glancing at the bathroom again as though he was about to tell a secret and was afraid that Chip might reappear, then looked at Ace again. “I don’t know if I should tell you this, but you know Chip’s never talked about marriage before. Not even as a joke. He’s always told me he’ll never settle down, it’s not in him. But when I look at you with him, and know the way he’s been talking about you, I know he’s serious this time.”

[Kat]

Ace listened intently to everything Colorado was saying, hoping it would calm his nerves. And it did, luckily. As he'd half suspected, Chip's outburst was likely a result of years of prodding from his friend, coupled with the frustration of simply not being able to tell his family yet. Of course he'd been bound to snap sooner or later. Ace felt a little foolish for being afraid of Chip, especially when the outburst hadn't had anything to do with him. And he did agree with Colorado in that Chip needed to tell his father, sooner than later. But he also knew that if Chip really was bothered by losing his father, it would indeed only make the whole thing harder. If his father were to come back, Ace was certain he'd likely hide all kinds of things from him if it meant he'd stay.

When Colorado brought up the subject of marriage, though, Ace once again looked up at him and listened. Personally, he'd been excited about getting married eventually for the past few years. Ace badly wanted a family of his own one day, he longed for the chance to have one person all to himself for the rest of his life. Even though he flirted a lot and the majority of his friends would likely be shocked at his desire to get married, after playing soccer professionally, marriage was probably the next thing on his list that he wanted. If Chip really was serious about him the way Colorado seemed to think he was, then Ace was very happy for it. So with a smile on his face he stood up and hugged the other man, kissing his cheek before sitting back down. "Thanks, Collie. You totally just saved me from freaking out and leaving." He took a sip from his glass of water, "as you can see, I don't really deal well with anger. I just shut down." He wasn't sure how much he wanted to say to the artist, so he decided to leave it at that.

He looked back at the bathroom door, wondering now if Chip was alright. Should he go and ask? He glanced down at his watch and noticed the time. He would have to leave soon if he was going to meet with Sparky, but there was no way he wanted to leave without making sure was okay. Even though their morning had been full of emotional twists and turns, Ace didn't want it to end, especially not on a sour note. So he hoped Chip would calm down enough and emerge from the bathroom soon.

[Cres]

Collie was at first a little surprised at the hug, but accepted it happily. He was only too glad to welcome Ace to his little "family" - after all, Chip and Dan were the only family he really had, no other friends were as close to him as these two, or at least Chip. Dan and Colorado had never got along perfectly.

"My pleasure, darling," he said to Ace with a smile, feeling really rather proud of himself upon hearing he had made such a difference. He didn't often get to be in any kind of important role. He, too, glanced at the bathroom door, slightly worried look on his face. "I guess I had best go get him back," he said as he started to rise. "I suspect he'd need a hug now."


[[leaving off here just in case Ace wants to be the one to fetch Chip back. Oh, and do you mind if Dan comes home soon, like just before Ace leaves? (I think Chip won't be in as much a hurry and can come an hour or two later.)]]

[Kat]

Ace smiled back at Collie, glad for their little moment. He rather liked the eccentric male, so he was happy that they'd had the chance to bond a little. When he started to rise, though, Ace stood up as well. "Actually why don't you let me go and get him? I'm going to have to leave soon, so you know, take the more private moments when they come. Even if they do have to be in a bathroom." Ace winked at Colorado before walking toward the bathroom door, unable to help but feel a little apprehensive. He hoped Chip had calmed down.

Stopping before the door Ace raised his hand up, softly rapping his knuckles on the door. "Chip? Can I come in?" He did find it just a little funny that Chip had taken refuge in the bathroom. It wasn't exactly the ideal place for a soothing talk, but he supposed it would have to do for now.


**Go ahead and bring Dan home, I guess our boys can't have the place to themselves the whole time. Oh and don't ask why I'm still up this late. >.< I'm going to work a little later tomorrow, since our power will be off here at home, hehe. I'm so dead tired though!**

[Cres]

[[Awwwwww OMG I wish I'd come back to check up on FA sooner then, we could've played since you were up! I'll be late at work today though, up until 5pm or so my time, so maybe if you manage to come around we could play some more. *hugs*]]

Chip hadn't moved the whole time from the toilet seat. He wasn't sure why he'd gone there - he supposed he might have pretended to wash his face or something, but then again, it was pretty obvious what was really going on. He regretted his flaring up quite a bit, though - he wouldn't have wanted Ace to see it, mostly because he didn't want to reveal that there was anything more deeply wrong. As he looked up at the door when Ace rapped on it he had to wonder what Collie had said. He knew Colorado had his own ideas of what exactly was wrong with Chip, but had he told Ace?

It might be better that way, he thought as he got up from the toilet seat and walked to the door. At least then he wouldn't need to lie to Ace to explain himself.

He opened the door, looking at Ace with a rather unreadable expression, suddenly quite lost for words.


[[Ohhh I can't wait to get to the kidnapping. Honestly, it's about all I think about these days! I even had a dream about it the other night, which is weird because I never see dreams about rp stuff!]]

[Kat]

Ace stood still when Chip opened the door, looking up at him. He certainly wasn't comforted at all by the look on Chip's face, unsure how he was feeling. But he was determined to find out. "Are you okay? I have to admit that I'm a little worried." Worried about what, he wasn't about to say. He just hoped Chip would talk to him, that he wouldn't try and be like most guys and hide his problems out of pride.


(I know!! The kidnapping will be good, hehe. And I just got up, so I should be at work in about an hour or so, so make sure you check back around 4ish your time hehe)

[Cres]

[[Yays we get to play a little before I'll go! ]]

Chip could only guess at what Colorado had told Ace, but the worry on the blond's face made him smile just a little. At least the boy hadn't freaked out - for that he could be grateful. Grateful to Collie, he assumed. He'd have to ask what the other man had said to Ace, later. For the moment, he just desperately needed a hug. Without a word he wrapped his arms around Ace, pulling him in for a hug, his other arm tightly round the blond's waist and the other on his shoulders.

"I'm okay," he said, then pulled his head back a little to look at Ace in the eyes. "I... hope I didn't scare you there."

His voice was rather regretful, but he didn't bother to hide that he'd gotten upset. It was far too obvious as it was, and he'd only add to his embarrassment by trying to hide it.

Further off, Colorado had turned halfway to the other direction and was pretending to be very busy with his eggs, discreetly allowing the two a moment.

Ronny had lifted his head, looking suddenly much more alert on his spot beside the TV, his ears perked up. He could hear Dan's steps in the hallway outside the door even though no human ear could yet detect it.

[Kat]

Ace gratefully sank against Chip, his arms winding around the other's waist. He didn't quite know what to say to Chip. Should he lie and say it hadn't bothered him? Or should he be honest and admit he was a little frightened? He figured that Chip knew him well enough by now, and that he felt comfortable enough with Chip, that he wouldn't be able to pull off lying to him all that well anymore. "Actually, you kind of did. I don't really deal well with anger, even if it's not directed at me. Well, violent anger, at least. The whole knocking down the chair and slamming the door freaked me out a bit, but Collie assured me it wasn't anything you do regularly, so it's okay." He was suprised he'd been able to look at Chip while saying it, while admitting how it had made him feel. He just hoped Chip wouldn't feel too badly about it.

*I'm at work now! So I will keep checking periodically, I don't really want to leave my browser open to the rp*

[Cres]

[[Yays! I have my own office for the moment so I'll probably keep the browser open, I've got so many programs open anyway that it's well hidden. Anyway, I'll be here until five, which is the next even hour coming up, then I'll leave for home. I try to come to post a few times during the evening too, I think, but I don't know yet what we'll do tonight so I can't promise anything. I'm just totally addicted to our boys. XD]]

Chip had to give a grateful glance to Collie's direction when Ace said that it'd been Collie who'd explained it to him. He looked at Ace, though, and smiled a little, though there was no real amusement or joy in that smile. Still, he didn't want to end the morning to a bad note, so he tried to get all the bad thoughts out of his head.

"I'm sorry... it's not really anything I do often, it's true. Just... there are things that... it doesn't matter." Chip's brown eyes were intently in Ace's green ones. "I just hope you know that I'd never get violent with you. Ever. I don't want to hurt you."


At the TV set, Ronny had sat up and was looking anxiously toward the door. He knew Dan was already there now, and would soon fumble for the keys and open the door.

Collie pretended to be completely absorbed with his breakfast.

[Kat]

Ace nodded, knowing in his heart that Chip would never do anything to harm him. But his head sometimes still made all the decisions. "I know, Chip. I just, well you know what I'm trying to say. Sometimes I just can't help but expect the worse. I think it was mostly due to shock though, since I'd never seen you angry before." Ace reached his hands up to lay on either side of Chip's face. "And it does matter, about those things that bother you. I know you're supposed to be the one supporting me, but if you ever need to get anything off of your chest, anything at all, talk to me about it. I don't think you have many people to talk to, from the looks of things. And even though I've been through a lot, it's really only my own pain I have a problem dealing with, I'm really strong when it comes to things others have gone through. So you could tell me anything, and it won't damage us. I promise." Ace stood up on his toes to place a kiss to his boyfriend's lips.

*Heh, yeah I'm so addicted to them too! Maybe Sparky will be running late so Ace can stick around for longer than he should be, hehe.*

[Cres]

Chip's entire body ached after those words. There was no way Ace could have known how much those words hurt him, though it wasn't because there would have been anything wrong with them, but exactly because they were so perfect and exactly what Chip needed to hear at that moment - only that he couldn't act on them. He couldn't tell, and now, after hearing those words, he felt even more like a liar for everything he was keeping from Ace. It made him feel so bad that he nearly got tears in his eyes and was only barely able to keep the pain from showing. He was about to open his mouth to say something though he wasn't sure what, when suddenly a sound from the door stopped him, and he glanced that way.

The door opened and Dan stepped in, his keys clinking as he took them out of the lock and closed the door behind him. Ronny let out a booming bark and got up, bounding to the door with an excited wag of the tail. He didn't jump up, he had been taught too well for that, but instead made a fuss around Dan's feet, hardly keeping still enough for the man to be able to pet him. Dan smiled and crouched down to scratch the dog thoroughly.

Collie turned from his eggs and looked at Dan. A wide smile spread on his face.

"Danny!" he exclaimed and bounced up from his chair, scurrying to the door. "There you are! I was beginning to think you were trying to avoid me!"

Dan looked up and his face dropped a little at the sight of Collie, and his ears turned a distinct shade of red.

"Colorado," he hissed, "you're not dressed!"

Colorado stopped suddenly and glanced at himself, looking quite puzzled. He was still wearing his morning gown, but it was revealing one of his legs in what would have been sensual way if one would have been interested in his style of dressing, and a fair bit of his chest was visible also. Realising that these little details - and probably the fact that he was dressed into a morning gown instead of actual clothes - was the reason for Dan's reaction, Colorado started laughing. The red on Dan's ears extended a little to his cheeks as well, though this time there was clearly an angrier look in the older man's eyes.

[Kat]

Ace saw the look in Chip's eyes after he'd spoken, wondering what the cause was for the emotion. Was he just not used to people offering to listen to his problems? Or was he hiding his own secret, the way Ace had been doing at first? Either way, he just hoped that Chip would tell him at some point.

When the door opened and Dan walked in, Ace turned to watch him. He wondered where he'd spent the night and what kind of mood he was in. When he reacted to Colorado's attire, or lack thereof, Ace couldn't help but instinctively shrink back against Chip. Even though he'd been momentarily frightened by his boyfriend's anger earlier, Dan really did unnerve him and make him a little uncomfortable. And there was always the chance that BP may have said something to him about them, and what if Dan took it out on him? He did seem quite angry at the moment, and Ace really did not want to draw any attention to himself until he knew why the other man was so grumpy.

[Cres]

Chip felt Ace pressing against him and knew what it meant - having just come out of a discussion of how angriness affected the blond. And then, Dan could be very intimidating at times anyway. Chip knew, however, that Dan was mostly harmless and wanted to show to Ace that at least right now, there was no need for fear. He stepped a little forward, to better view of Dan and Collie, holding Ace tightly with one arm while he did so.

"Why, Dan, I didn't know you cared," Collie was just saying with a giggle - he wasn't intimidated. It was a banter between Collie and Dan which at times tensed their relationship but which, because of the love both males felt for Chip, never broke out into actual arguments. Underneath it all, Dan did, after all, like Colorado.

Dan crossed his arms over his chest with a furrowed brow and a grumpy expression.

"It's not that," he said. "It's just... Oh, why do I bother?"

He snorted a little, letting it go at that mainly because he knew he didn't really have any real reason to feel uncomfortable with half-dressed Colorado. Chip examined his old friend quietly. Things had still not been settled between them, and though he didn't feel as angry at Dan anymore, he didn't quite know how to correct things between them.

"I'm surprised to see you home so early," he said. "I thought you were spending the night somewhere else."

Dan met Chip's eyes, and the grumpiness on his face melted away to give way to more uncomfortable expression.

"I was," he said, and he looked at Chip intently, meaningful expression in his eyes, but one that only Chip could read. He had done a lot of thinking the previous night. "But I wanted to... we're still on for Halloween, aren't we?"

Chip was quiet for a while, meeting Dan's eyes. It was impossible to tell what was passing between the two of them, save that they obviously shared some thoughts wordlessly. It sometimes felt like telepathy to Chip - knowing what the other thought without hearing a single word. Yet, he supposed, it happened when you knew someone well enough.

Chip smiled a little. Dan's eyes spoke enough. It was an offer of peace.

"Sure," he said.


[[hrrnh... I'll cut it off here and go. I want to make it to my train, haha. I'll try to come back for a post or two during the evening though.]]